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For the world is but a stage, and you are but just another player.
Here I stand with my semester over and the result of what I have done in these last 6 months is going to be out in 10 days! Obviously it’s not exactly something new going to befall only on me but yes it does make me think deeply that once again MY value or more appropriately my brain’s value will once again be measured in numbers. The more I can score on the scale of 10, more the people will accept that my brain has got a sharper portion that’ll make me a worthy engineer some day. And yes, worthy doesn’t really mean that I can come up with some great digital and analogue circuits or some amazing communication systems, it actually means that on the placement day I should be able to grab a package that will make people talk about me and tell their children to look up to me to get motivated for something big in their life!
But thinking all this makes me realize that this number game has trapped me ever since I entered the education system. In my school days, I found myself trapped in a 2-digit number system that was my percentage. For straight 12 years, this 2-digit number system kept haunting and judging me. At times, it judged me for being eligible for some prize or medal and sometimes it counted my chances of getting into the good books of a teacher. In 10th standard, marks meant a big deal, they were like the signboards fixed on a road that tell you the way to opt, in my case 90+ opt for science and 90- take commerce!
Two years later, my 12th arrived and it felt like now the marks were more important than my life. From teachers to parents, relatives to neighbors everyone seemed to bet on my capability to score in my boards. And why won’t they bet after all, from the college admissions to clearing the eligibility criterion for entrances everything depends on that 2-digit percentage! Once you enter the entrance phase your worth is decided by the various cut-offs and the number system turns to 3-digit (and you really got to work like a machine to achieve a 3-digit score!) A score of 180+ in JEE will open the gates of the holy IITs (I bet you are treated no less than a god once you get in there) and if you can’t score that you form the majority of students in our country. But don’t consider yourself lucky if u get into some good college because once you get in there you’ll again struggle for pointers and percentages!
No matter how much we hate it but life and customs make us players of the number game, kind of born-players. We need not get trained for the game. The game just requires you to imbibe your course books more than your surroundings and your life and you will emerge out as a winner. I am not writing all this because I hate studies but because I have always dwelled why it was always so important that I could solve a differential and integral problem whereas, no one ever asked me that can you differentiate the biggest problems of your life and integrate all the possible solutions for them? Why was I never asked that “are you enjoying your work?” Mugging some hundreds of chemical equations always had a higher priority than understanding the equations of relationships I connect to! Why the question was always about the motion of a block of mass 5 kg and not about the motion of my dreams and desires who although didn’t possess a mass but meant the world to me. The instruction always said be confident for the exam or “ache se karna paper” but it never said be confident in your life and don’t stop till you find the best possible solutions for all your difficulties.
Huh! But then this is how we are brought up and taught to live life. The fact remains more or less the same we are the players of the number game. Born players!